Confused

I guess I'm just confused. I don't really understand what my friend is thinking. I'm doing everything that he told me to do, I'm asking how he is and trying to talk to him about things but I never get a response. And he keeps saying that he wants a relationship but he doesn't like his other friend being in a relationship. I guess I'm just a girl and what I say doesn't matter. I've tried helping and now we can even make conversation in the car. I feel really disconnected from him. I would never in a million years lose him as my friend. He's been there through the thick and thin. He's like the older brother I don't have. He knows all my secrets, everything. Even if he doesn't look like he's listening I know he cares. And it breaks my heart knowing that I'm ultimately doing something wrong. I guess I don't understand. Maybe...I dunno I just don't know. I'm not going to have the answers all the time. I just want to know he is okay. There's too much that has happened for me not to worry about him. Maybe I need to let go and stop worrying. But how can I when he is family to me?

Halloween

It doesn't really feel like Halloween this year. I feel like it's just another day but I get to dress up. Maybe that's because I dress up for play and act crazy all the time. The real answer will never be discovered but I really do love Halloween. I like seeing what ideas people can come up with for costumes. I went to school this year dressed up as Apolo Ohno; blue bandanna and soul patch. It was very fun. Now that I'm home I'm eating all the candy that is for the trick-or-treaters. I'm sitting here dress up in a Katy Perry costume with a Captain Jack Sparrow wig on. This is absolutely hilarious. I don't like that I'm by myself though. I didn't do anything fun for Halloween this year so it's been a drag. I tried to figure out plans but didn't really work out. Oh well I suppose, I have hot chocolate and a surplus of candy what else do I need ( I can think of a few things I need.) Well happy Halloween! Maybe I'll post pictures of the pumpkins I carved. But to finish the post I'm going to put a song up by Regina Spektor. Surprise, surprise. So here's Calculation by Regina Spektor.
-Brittney
P.S. Listen closely to the lyrics

Jesu- Jelly fish

What did you think I was going to write? I would have but obviously I put on my brain backwards today. I am completely exhausted. Real night of sleep has been only a dream for two weeks now. I've been running around nonstop, it's crazy. Romeo and Juliet is going awesomely. People keep telling me that I'm amazing and I love it (not going to lie). I tried out for another play too but I didn't get a part because I got the lead role in Romeo and Juliet so it's supposed to give someone else a chance to shine. I'm cool with that but I don't have anything to do this winter except learn to snowboard. Which will be an adventure of its own. (Note to self: remind parents that, that is to be my birthday present.)  I shall not forget! Anyway...I do have auditions in two weeks for a musical. I don't sing in front of people nor do I know how to read music. Hahaha so this will be very very interesting. Ouch my feet hurt. Ugh I have to go clean my stupid saddle shoes that are adorable but I do hate them. I need to go running I feel gross. I like chocolate way too much considering I'm eating some right now. Wow I'm just a freak or I'm just extremely tired. Both, I would say both. I love me. Hahaha this post is now pointless so adieu!
-Brittney

That fast

That fast. Like a snap of a finger, in a jiffy, seconds, but it's been months. Ah I'm so scared but happy at the same time. I'm not sure if I'll be able to sleep these next few nights because I'm so just ahhh! The pageant is finally here and I feel so prepared and unprepared if that makes sense. Probably not but oh well. I really am hoping for the best and even if I don't win there are some amazing girls competing with me and I know any of them will do a great job at representing Idaho. I have come to love them and I can't wait to spend more time with them. After this is over some of the pressure will finally be lifted. Well I have some more prep to do so I will update on Sunday or Monday. Have a lovely weekend!
-Brittney

Dear ----

Seriously are you freaking kidding me! You have had seven weeks to get your lines down but nope you were to busy goofing around. And now I'm supposed to feel bad for you? No I could careless what's going on in your personal life because let me tell you something. I have been working my butt off to know my lines while you're on stage making sexual immature comments about everything! Screw you! You have no idea how much I have going on right now. I have stressed myself to a point where I have made myself sick. Thanks a lot. I shouldn't have to babysit someone whose supposedly been in acting troupes and big plays. Lies, that's what I say. Sorry about you're family but guess what I DON'T care. I have lost my patience for you and I will show you no sympathy. Obviously you don't take this play as serious as I do. This play is my life right now and if you mess it up in anyway I swear to God I will make your life miserable. I am so so pissed off at you. You better not call line on Monday because if you do I will personally murder you. Everyone else can say line because at least they're taking this play to heart. If I was to have it my way you would have been long gone before this. I really hope you get your act together or I will say things to you that would get me kicked out of the play.
-Brittney

Francais

Je adore francais. Je ne sais pas beaucoup mais j'aime francais. Je suis americaine mais les francais sont mieux. J'ai eu repetitions aujourd'hui. Il sont bien. Je crois que nous faut beaucoup de repetitions. Je suis nerveuse beaucoup et inquiete. Oh bien. J'ai beaucoup a faire. Je dois aller. Je voudrais une tarte...Je prefer potiron de la tarte, pomme de la tarte, et chocolat de la tarte. S'il vous plait me faire une tarte. Je me suis perdue, tres perdue...Il est difficile jouer le role de Juliet. Mais amusant. Je suis stressee...maintenant je dois partir. A la prochaine.
-Brittney

Cake Pops

I love cake pops they are adorable, delicious and fun to make. Well fun to make if you know what you are doing. Anyway...I remembered that I was going to post pictures of them on here and I never did! So I shall do that now. The blue and white ones I made for my friend's party and they took me seven hellish hours. They were chocolate cake with chocolate frosting. Super delicious.  The red and orange ones I made for my dad's birthday. They only took me around two hours. They were a spice cake with cream cheese frosting almost better than the chocolate ones. But the next batch I plan on making will be near the end of this month. I'm not sure what flavor but I think they're going to be red and pink but not sure yet. But here are the pictures I promised a long time ago.

-Brittney

Regina Spektor

I must say that I am completely in love with her music. I haven't heard one song that I dislike. She is absolutely amazing. I know I have posted her song "Us" from (500) Days of Summer, check out that song it's great but I'm going to post a few of my favorite songs right now by her because I love them. I hope you enjoy them as much as I do!
-Brittney

Fall

It's finally fall. It may not seem like it because it's still warm. But I have no doubt that this fall will be great! I'm finally turning 16. Romeo and Juliet going up at the end of October. Homecoming game tonight, and homecoming dance tomorrow! Everything right now is just simple. Nothing to worry about.
All the birds are flying south and I thought about it one night while running. What would it be like to be a bird. It would be absolutely fantastic. Not having to worry about anything except yourself. You could go anywhere you wanted all the time. Take some time and think about what you would do if you were a bird.
-Brittney